Docs and Online Dating: Is 'MD' the Ticket to Love?

Roxanne Nelson, RN, BSN


October 15, 2019

In busy world where time is scarce, online dating has exploded in popularity. Like anyone else, physicians have discovered the pros and cons of cyberspace romance.

For example, take Harry Schneider, MD, PhD, MPH, a consultant in neurolinguistics at The Brain Function Laboratory at Yale School of Medicine:

Online dating? Not for me. Or so I had thought.

I had met my wife in college. We clicked. We resonated together. We got married before medical school and attended Columbia University medical school together.

We became doctors together. We had a child together, and life was good...until she died of an asthma attack.

After years, the nurses at the hospital told me I had mourned enough. The nurses, doctors, attendings, and even the x-ray techs told me to move on.

They all suggested "online dating." They told me to bring my pager and have friends at the ER call me after 15 minutes of the first date: "code blue" if things weren't going well.

There were lots of code blues. I wasn't happy with online anything. Then I made a date with Debra. Why not? She told me she did not want to get married, ever, or have children ever. Perfect.

Even better, she didn't believe anything I had told her: I was Lancelot looking for Guinevere; I had a white horse ready to rescue the maiden of my dreams. And [I told her] a few other things about me that made her curious but not gullible. All those things [I said] were true.

Except my age. I had begun to ratchet down my age after I noticed that the pool of available women was looking thin after age 40. So I took 15 years off my stated age.

That she believed!

Then one day my daughter told me I was a scoundrel for not telling her the truth. I met Debra for dinner one night on my motorcycle, told her the truth, and then [left], feeling worse than the scoundrel my daughter thought me to be.

Debra knocked on my door about 1 hour later. She huffed and puffed and said that "scoundrel" did not do me justice.

Then I asked her to marry me. It was the night two planets could be seen in the night sky.


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