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Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023
| Contributor Information
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Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
The time demands of a medical career often make it uniquely difficult for physicians to develop and nurture friendships. Yet, those relationships are vital to their mental health and well-being.
In this report, more than 1500 doctors in over 29 specialties candidly discussed their greatest challenges to forging friendships, balancing friend and family time, their ability to develop opposite-gender friendships, and related topics.
In this report, gender is based on how physicians self-identified in our survey.
Some totals in this presentation do not equal 100% because of rounding.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
About 7 in 10 doctors said they steer clear of patient friendships in both this year's and last year's reports.
The American Medical Association counsels physicians against treating friends on ethical grounds, for several reasons. These include difficulty in maintaining objectivity or being sufficiently candid, issues protecting patient confidentiality with the friend's significant other and family, and the potential emotional toll on the doctor.
As doctors strive to meet their profession's ethical guidelines, Karen Fingerman, PhD, cautions them against reflexively counting a patient as a friend on the basis of friendly conversation alone. Fingerman is a professor of human development and family sciences at the University of Texas and has researched friendship in American society.
"As a doctor, you may want to have a friendly rapport with your patient but be more restrictive with what you consider to be a friendship," she says.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Around one third of both male and female physicians said a friendship led to their romantic relationship. In the general population, more than two thirds of romances began with being just friends, according to one study.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
As in last year's report, around 3 in 4 physicians said the time demands of career and family "always" or "sometimes" leave little time for friends.
Time pressures are omnipresent in modern medicine in America, which is one reason you'll find physicians generally, and surgeons and anesthesiologists specifically, on U.S. News & World Report's list of the 20 most stressful jobs.
"These are stressful jobs, and they've been particularly stressful during the time of COVID," says Rosemary Blieszner, PhD, MS, a senior fellow at Virginia Tech's Center for Gerontology who has studied friendships. Researchers have found that amid such stress, Americans have started to value a reliable confidant over having a larger number of friends, she says.
"We have asked what being a friend means to people, and often they say, 'It's knowing that someone is there for me,'" according to Blieszner.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
When a rare free hour arises, doctors choose to spend it with family. About 7 in 10 physicians said they "rarely" or "never" prioritize friend outings over job or family.
Fingerman finds it "striking, kind of amazing" that 31% of physicians at least occasionally prioritized friend time first. Younger and/or unmarried doctors are likelier to have that flexibility, says Crystal Ng, who co-authored research papers on friendship with Fingerman as a doctoral student.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
A common perception is that political divisions and culture wars put friendships at risk in 2023 America. Yet, about two thirds of doctors said they have never ended a friendship for any of the reasons cited above.
Evolutionary Behavioral Sciencespublished research suggesting four broad categories for why friendships end: (1) selfishness (eg, the feeling that a friend became too self-interested); (2) lack of frequent interaction (due to time demands, distance, and other factors); (3) romantic complications (eg, the friend becomes interested in you or your significant other); and (4) perceptions (eg, the feeling that family or your significant other disapproves of your friend).
In her research, Blieszner has found that people are likelier to let friendships wither and die over geographic distance or declining shared interests than to directly end the relationship. It usually takes something significant like "a feeling of betrayal or divulged confidence" to get someone to confront a friend, she says.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Female physicians were likelier than their male counterparts to confide more often in a friend than in their significant other. They answered yes to this question slightly more frequently than in last year's report (50%).
Putting aside any choice of a friend over a partner, Ng says general research on friendships in American society shows that women are more prone than men to share emotional matters with a friend.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Brookings Institution research indicates that people are more likely to make friends with people in the same socioeconomic class — especially when both of them are wealthy.
"How do we find friends? We find them in the places where we spend most of our time," Blieszner notes. "It could be at work, around your neighborhood, in your community activities. The people you encounter there are likely to have common interests with yours and sometimes common demographics.
"In our research, people often told us they didn't think it was important that their friends be like them. But we also had data on those friends, and in fact they were very similar."
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
The vast majority of physicians said they are willing to give medical counsel to friends, even though the American Medical Association advises them to tactfully suggest that friends seek out another doctor. "Has anyone ever said no to this question?" one respondent asked. "I can't imagine there is a physician out there who has never given advice to a friend."
Fingerman and Ng agree that it's asking a lot to expect a doctor to turn away when a friend tries to pick their brain. "When people ask you for advice, it's so hard to say no, especially if your guidance is going to be something casual like 'exercise more,'" Ng says.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Male and female physicians were about equally likely to have opposite-sex friends. But women said yes to these friendships somewhat less often than in last year's report (82%).
"The really interesting thing is, there is research showing that men say they are more likely to confide in women — but so are women," Blieszner says.
"Perhaps this is because women often are socialized to listen and think differently than men do about friendships. They are more accustomed to playing this role of confidant."
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Responses to this question have been pretty consistent in this year's and last year's reports. By strong majorities, both male and female physicians said they don't get any pushback at home over their opposite-sex friendships.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
By far, doctors most often pointed to the time needed as a challenge to nurturing a close friendship. It can take about 50 hours for an acquaintance to evolve into a casual friend, and 200 hours or more together before two people can consider themselves to be close friends, according to research in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships.
Where is a time-pressed physician going to find 200 hours? "The entire adult population in the US finds it difficult now to come up with the time, energy, or resources to maintain a friendship," Fingerman says.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
As we found in last year's report, physicians said they only infrequently quarreled with good friends, although men were slightly more prone to do so.
"Most people don't persist in keeping other people close to them unless they're really getting along," Blieszner notes. "That's because they expect comfort and affirmation from these relationships."
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Turning against someone, especially in a time of need, is a strong step to take. Still, around 4 in 10 physicians (similar to in last year's report) believed that at least one friend had betrayed them.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Friendships or marriages — or both — may be ended when a friend becomes inappropriately tight with your spouse or significant other. In last year's report, 91% of male physicians and 92% of their female counterparts said this never happened to them. Doctors seem to feel that the great majority of their friendships stay in their proper lanes.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Just over half of physicians said they count between one and 10 people as friends.
For some time now, the medical profession has been urged by social scientists and experts specializing in burnout to seek more work and personal friendships. The optimum number of friends needed to keep up one's mental health will vary by individual.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Close friendships have been on the downswing in America for 30 years, according to the 2021 American Perspectives Survey. It found that 12% of Americans had no close friends and about 73% had five or fewer (vs 7% and 70%, respectively, of physicians in our survey).
These data show that doctors are in line with the rest of society in having lower numbers of close friends.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Compared with last year's report, physicians were more likely to value their friends holding similar political views. They were slightly likelier to say that similar stages in life and similar backgrounds were necessary for their friendships.
"Starting with childhood, we feel more comfortable if we have shared experiences with our friends," Blieszner says. "If you don't have to explain in detail what you're going through or where you're coming from, it really reinforces the relationship.
"But at a societal level, one of the dangers with people being so 'siloed' these days is a lack of understanding of people who are different. I would think it's important for physicians to be able to relate to those people."
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Social media and travel blogs are not short on tales of vacations with friends that were ruined by bad planning, boredom, or blowups.
Be that as it may, only about 1 in 7 doctors can point to a shared vacation that soured a friendship.
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Who's Got Your Back?: Medscape Physician Friendships Report 2023
Jon McKenna | July 20, 2023 | Contributor Information
Medscape Physicians and Taxes Report 2023: Are You Paying Too Much?
Physicians reveal their annual income tax bills and tax rates, whether they do their own taxes, how they feel about auditors and the US tax system, and other insights into their tax dealings.Medscape Features Slidshow, Jul 2023
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Jon McKenna
Senior Editor, Reports, Medscape Business of Medicine
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